I prayed for three specific things last week.
The next day they were all definitively answered with a big, loud YES. I barely knew what to do. I was stopped in my tracks when it dawned on me that yes, yes, YES, these are the answers. I offered up a hesitant thanks to God.
I hesitated because I know my heart. Human. Forgetful. Back and forth, back and forth. I don’t always bring my prayers to Him because sometimes I feel like it doesn’t matter anymore. I know this isn’t right.
But I do bring prayers to Him. Big ones, little ones, acronym ones learned in Sunday School.
Of course the yes answers made me surface-ly “happy.” They were things that were small, but important to me. YES!
Maybe I should go back and add a couple things to the list! Like a kid who just ate their ice cream, “Could I just please have seconds? One more scoop?”
I know deeper in my heart (deeper than the momentary happiness of seeing a yes play out in real life), that I should react with thanks to the Lord.
The same way I should react when there is no answer.
The same way I should when the answer is a resounding NO.
This is not easy. (Understatement.)
Thank you, Lord.
When I was in college, my friend received a check in the mail that paid for her semester. I was working twenty hours a week and full-time during the summer to help pay for my bills. When I, rather dejectedly, told my dad about the check in the mail, he wrote a letter to me (that I still have) and said, “Don’t be someone who needs that check in the mail to boost your faith in the Lord.”
He was telling me to make my faith my own and not compare it to others’. He was telling me to remain dependent on the Lord for spiritual things which He has provided freely. He was telling me that when the check does come in the mail, it’s fine and it’s good and praise should be given. And yes, when the “no” or the silence keeps staring us in the face, we need to continue to rely on the Lord.
And my praise to Him should be the same in all circumstances.
Thank you, Lord.